I MISS SHARK WEEK!

CHECK OUT THE VIDEO FIRST TO SET THE MOOD!


As Lady Gaga would say, "SHOW ME YOUR TEETH!"  Shark Week colored my television screen with blood all last week.  I must admit the shows are quite educational.  I learned that the first ever record of an American shark attack was in July of 1916.  And yup...it was in New Jersey!  Hmmm...perhaps MTV should have an episode of "Jersey Shore" dedicated to seeing which cast member can swim the furthest:)

Anyway, the reason I even chose this particular show, besides its cool name, "Blood in the Water", is because these first attacks influenced the movie Jaws.  I'm not a huge fan of Steven Spielberg, but even I have a soft spot for this movie.  I'm not even sure if it's the great white that makes me shit my pants, or the anxiety attack I feel coming on at the sight of miles and miles of ocean water.  Regardless, Jaws is a classic.  Period.

Unfortunately, there are so many movies that butcher the fear of sharks.  Deep Blue Sea was just too sci-fi for me.  Plain and simple...if it can't happen in real life, I don't want to watch it.  Sharks are scary enough, therefore, why the hell do you need to jazz them up with superpowers.  Blah...

Open Water really rubbed me the wrong way.  The movie states in bold letters that it is based on a true story.  Last time I checked, this story was about a couple who found themselves accidentally abandoned in the middle of the ocean when their boat left without them.  They were never found.  The movie was pretty much marketed this as a bloody shark movie.  Dammit...it worked because I definitely contributed to their bullshit profits by purchasing this DVD.

My complaint isn't even directed at the fact that they threw sharks in as bait so more people would watch it.  My problem is that the movie was too slow even for Clint Eastwood.  The R rating label came strictly from the pointless boob shot in the beginning of the movie, and there wasn't even a friggin' shark attack.  It was more like a shark bite.  They would have been better off exaggerating the fabrication of the possible shark theory.  I spent the whole time on edge for NO climax.

I recently watched the movie The Reef.  It was a typical, mediocre shark movie.  A group of people are stranded in the middle of the ocean yada yada yada, and then dunt dunt dunt dunt dunt dunt.  I do believe an hour passed before I saw the first shark of the film, but overall it was satisfyingly scary and rocked a few awesome shark attacks.

I must admit my favorite shark movie of all time is Jaws The Revenge.  I grew up watching this when I was a child who didn't realize that like 98% of all sequels suck.  Well this one landed in the thumbs up percentile in my opinion.  Please ignore the fact that it has been acknowledged as one of the worst movies ever on many peoples' hall of shame lists.  Fuck them:)

Every time I hear "The First Noel" Christmas carol I think of the opening blood bath shark attack!  I really like the transition from the unsettling ocean to the fish eye being cooked by a main character.  In the same scene, the first shark victim cuts himself by mistake, foreshadowing his violent death in the near future.  I mean, who cares if this film's plot was based on the ridiculous theory that the shark was the original killer from the first film.  The gore and sentimental value combined keeps it on top of my shark list.

A new shark movie comes out September 2.  shark Night 3D will probably not be worth the $13 ticket, but I'm pretty certain there will be boobs and blood!

AMERICAN HISTORY X

1998
Director:  Tony Kaye

Writer:  David McKenna

Starring:  Edward Norton, Edward Furlong, Beverly D'Angelo, and Fairuza Balk

This is one of those movies that leaves a scar on your heart and has a place in your memory forever.  If you ask someone if they have ever seen it, just the natural reaction of that teeth breaking emotion of pain explodes over their face, answering your question with a yes.

First and foremost, I have to confess my love for Edward Norton.  He is just awesome.  I have seen him execute every different type of character and personality.  You may always recognize his face from film to film, but you can never take his roles for granted until you see the credits.  He even beats Ted Bundy for the champion of sociopathy when he is on camera.

I love that American History X opens and closes with a beach.  It makes me compare the ocean and the reality of racism.  It's overwhelming and looks to be infinite in size.  It can swallow you up before you know it.

I also really dig the use of black and white for the obvious reasons, along with the symbolism behind it.  Naturally, the absence of color differentiates the past from the present while the story flash backs in time to tell a story.  I always have a soft spot for these special moments in movies.  However, when the screen changes like that in this film, I feel the director wanted us to see in black and white because that's all the main characters saw.  They ignored everything about people to exert their focus on their skin color instead.  Whenever color entered the viewers vision again, Edward Norton's character, Derek, was out of prison with a reformed mind set.  In other words, he removed the hate that was obstructing his view, and he gained his sight back while we were able to see color again.

The excitement integrated with the eye-popping scenes of violence made a two hour movie fly by.  There were a lot of character building scenes that consisted of large chunks of dialogue.  Sometimes a lot of talking can make you check your watch twice in one minute, but on the other hand, the movie creators only have 120 minutes to introduce a character, and in this case a transformation of character, well enough to get the viewer emotionally attached to him.  This movie does a genius job with this because although I do not agree with Derek's initial attitude,  I was still intrigued by his knowledge and intensity.  His preaching and leadership grabbed you by the throat, but him smashing a guy's skull open on a curb shivered your spine.

It's rare you come across a man raping another man on screen.  In my opinion, I find that all rape scenes, regardless the circumstance, haunt my memory.  Unfortunately, I find it difficult to cleanse my eyes and ears of the damage done even if it is just a movie being filmed with hundreds of crew members surrounding the victim.  Well to say the least, it must have been awkward for Edward Norton to accept the role of "Derek" knowing what was in store for him.

On a side note, I will be meeting Edward Furlong at Monster Mania in Cherry Hill, NJ at the end of this month!  I think I'm more excited to hear his distinct voice in person!  Hasta la vista, Baby!